While I was with Jim he was my main purpose in life, and now that he is gone it like I am floundering, It was so funny I couldn't wait for the day when he was gone, and now I am aimless and lost. It isn't that I want him back it is just that I devoted so much of my self to his happiness and comfort, and received nothing back, and rather than see this as a sign I just worked harder to please him, the more I put in, the less I got back. So it is not him I miss but rather having a purpose in life.
I think perhaps that I shall dedicate more time to me, get me back on track, to what I wanted done for me. Jim failed to give me what I wanted/needed, so what is wrong in my doing it for myself, I did it before, I can do it again.
At least it is a project I know something about and what needs to be done.
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